Pilates is a holistic health movement method. I’ve understood this for years but found it tricky to express – tricky to describe a method that delivers so much. Any one who teaches or practices regularly will understand it reaches far beyond biomechanical movement. Pilates has the power to recalibrate lives. The vitality that we experience hooks us and this feeling I’ve realised is impossible to walk away from when found. As a teacher of pilates I have been a magpie for over 15 years, in my nest I have woven what I feel is absolute magic.
Ok, Pilates fixed me initially. It fixed my knee to allow me to run a marathon. It held my pelvic floor whilst carrying my sons. Pilates has helped my hypermobile body to be strong. It’s supported me as a triathlete for seven years – injury free. It’s held me upright, grounding and inspiring me since 2000. Pilates has built me up from a heartbreaking divorce which led me to ditch a career in London to become a teacher. Helping others on their journey has kept the magic alive in me, it’s been the thread that held me together, the foundation I needed to find my voice and the expression I needed to flourish.
It’s been a journey of self discovery I have explored my deepest depths and realised my deepest truths.
I had a breakdown in my early 30’s it was dark I had two young boys and I broke. Broke to a point that I was taken out of my life briefly to recalibrate. The trauma of this time went back to childhood – my own mother left when I was three. Finding myself now as a mum was disorientating, anxiety inducing and at times just too overwhelming and then my childhood sweetheart after 17 and half years left me. I was rudderless I started to drown. I broke; it was deep.
A few hands held out and I grabbed and held on tightly. A light started to shine into my depths that revealed a deep rooted inner strength. I remember the day I came home, I got into bed with my two little boys under each arm and for them I knew I could get through this. For them I had to be strong. I was a mother who wasn’t leaving, I was a mother that loved fiercely, I wasn’t my mother, I had my own path now. Time to sit in my own nest. Time to use the integrity Pilates taught me.
I built myself up. I found my strength, like finding those deep intrinsic layers of core muscles. I worked hard on understanding me, my emotional and spiritual self. I always had my Pilates Practise, patience, perseverance made me physically stronger. Finishing my first ever pilates training was exciting and terrifying in equal measure. Who was I to teach this stuff? But the more I taught the more confidence I found. To this day I have never stopped learning about this method. I am an introvert, every time I stand in front of a class my heart rate elevates. I care about it, I care that I give 110%. I care that you also get the essence of Pilates in all its layers. In ten years I turned my life around by building my nest. I have fallen out dozens of times but nothing ever grows in your comfort zone, right? Today I’m unashamedly flourishing.
My nest firstly holds me. I am a priority. I have found some useful tools along the way. In my top three: trees, movement and sleep. I have developed my own self care package and it’s often messy. Self care might not always be a candlelit salt bath. It could mean committing to a morning routine, cooking yourself healthy meals and no longer just running from your problems and calling the distraction a solution. Secondly, finding a purpose and passion and helping others. I can’t tell you the power this has to brighten your own inner skies. It’s a revolving door of gratitude.
There are zillions of feathers and twigs lining my nest, I’m grateful everyday for so much. But especially I’m grateful to Pilates, the thread that’s helped me flourish. I am weaving the magic. I just know people can feel it, to every single one of you that has walked through my studio doors, I know you can feel it, when taught properly its connection, its cellular and energetically recalibrating. It has the power to heal and transform lives.
“I can do nothing for you but work on myself – you can do nothing for me but work on yourself”Ram Das